615 Unplugged

Corrado (00:00)
Welcome to 615 Unplugged, where we explore the people, businesses, and stories that make Middle Tennessee what it is today and what it will be tomorrow. Today's episode is truly special for me because I am joined by Rebecca Mariani, a Realtor in Middle Tennessee who was truly a godsend for me and my family during our move from Florida to Middle Tennessee. On today's episode, we discuss her background, the importance of community, and the lessons learned from her experiences in real estate.

She emphasizes the significance of follow-up in business, getting to the unique appeal of middle Tennessee and the challenges that come from the rapid growth. And last but not least, Rebecca opens up and reflects on personal growth, the importance of grace and her passion for helping others through her own experiences. So without further ado, sit back, relax and enjoy this conversation with Rebecca Mariani.

Corrado (00:59)
Rebecca, welcome to the show.

Rebecca (01:01)
Hey, Toronto, thanks for having me. Excited to be here.

Corrado (01:04)
It is my pleasure. Honestly, I knew when I was going to start the show that you were going to be one of those first people that I needed to have on because honestly, if it wasn't for you, we probably our move would not have been as smooth as it was. So honestly, I can't I know I've told you this in person many, many, many times. I can't thank you enough. Like the way that you helped us was incredible, incredible. So.

Rebecca (01:23)
Thank you.

Thank you, very

kind of you. It was a true privilege, honestly. Loved working with you guys.

Corrado (01:37)
Yeah, so before we get started, obviously, ⁓ if there's somebody that's listening that doesn't know who you are, go ahead and take a second to introduce yourself, tell them a little bit about yourself, and then we'll get going.

Rebecca (01:47)
Sure, sure. My name is Rebecca Mariani and I'm a local realtor here in Middle Tennessee. I have five children now. We're actually recently remarried. So my husband had three, I had two. So now we've got a blended family. So we have two 11 year olds, ⁓ almost nine year old, eight year old, and a four year old. So we spend our days doing family. I know, right? Yeah. When we're not doing laundry or fixing food. ⁓

Corrado (02:08)
So you have a lot of time by yourself, right? Like you have a lot of time in your hands.

Rebecca (02:17)
Yeah, our time is filled honestly with work, with our church, with our community, and doing family things, and we just really enjoy being together.

Corrado (02:26)
And remind me again, how long have you been doing real estate?

Rebecca (02:31)
Gosh, about 20 years actually in the industry.

Corrado (02:35)
How did you get into that? How did you fall into that? Because I know that you've done some other things, like Dave Ramsey and everything. Maybe you can kind of talk a little bit about that.

Rebecca (02:42)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah, absolutely. And that's actually where my real estate career started was with Ramsey. ⁓ actually, when I was, ⁓ after I graduated high school, I went and did an internship for a year at a ⁓ church organization down in Texas. And after that year, I came back home and was trying to figure out what I wanted to do, was planning to go to college, kind of your typical route. And in the meantime, ⁓ my dad actually was like, hey, well, if you're looking for a job, I think Ramsey's organization is hiring.

and he had some connections there in the past. I was like, okay, so maybe I can get a job in the meantime, then go to college in the spring. So I ended up applying there and got a temporary assistant position for what was then called the Endorse Local Provider Real Estate Program. And so what they did actually was endorse top agents all over the country and sent them people that needed to buy or sell. So people would listen to Dave's show.

they would need to buy our cell home and because talk radio is a very intimate form of communication, they would really trust Dave and his advice and so they would get connected with an agent Dave recommended and ⁓ we ran that program. So I started there as an assistant and did that for about, I ended up falling in love with the job first of all and that temp position turned into a full-time position and fell in love with it and about five years after that I ended up moving into a sales position on the same team.

And then about three years after that, there was a whole reorgan in the company and I ended up being able to move into the vice president role and ran the entire team. Had about 25 people reporting to me. So ⁓ learned so much about business while I was there. Had the best leadership ⁓ ever, but really became passionate about real estate. Working with the top agents across the country just made me love it. And just seeing how people's lives could be changed just because, you know, a home is typically somebody's largest financial transaction. And so it's a

big deal to be a part of that. so once I ended up leaving Ramsey's after I had my second son, just because I wanted to kind of have a little more freedom, do real estate myself personally and be home, ended up working here in middle Tennessee and kind of starting my own thing here in middle Tennessee and have been doing that now since probably 2023-ish, 2022, somewhere in there. So.

It's been really such a great journey to do it on my own after watching so many top people do it, learning from the best of the best, and then just applying those principles to my own business. It's just made it really easy to kind of step into it. And the things that are hard for most people come easy to me. And the things that were easy, I was nervous about little things like, how do I open a lock box? Silly things like that. But when it came to talking to people, that was easy. That came second nature. So I've loved it.

Corrado (05:26)
How,

what are some of those things that, you know, you, right now you can look back and say, wow, thank God for the, you know, I learned this principle or this thing through those times that Dave Ramsey and managing all of these people and, and dealing with so many realtors all over the place. What are some of those things that you think, gosh, thank God I went through that because if, if not, I probably wouldn't be doing these sets of things in my business that have proven to be, you know,

Rebecca (05:44)
Okay.

yeah.

Corrado (05:55)
Great.

Rebecca (05:56)
Oh yeah, absolutely. First thing is understanding follow up. We used to teach our agents when they would follow up with the leads, we'd send them like, you have to assume they're interested until you hear otherwise. A lot of times people are just busy. And typically an agent would follow up with someone two or three times and be like, oh well, I guess they're not interested. When really that...

almost never was the case. It's more like, they're busy going to kids' soccer games, or like every time you call, they happen to be in the car with the kids, or it's just all these things where it's like, assume they're interested until you hear otherwise. So that's given me lot of confidence in my follow-up game as far as following up with people and just remembering what I've taught and telling myself, they haven't answered in a while, but it's okay, keep following up. So that's helped me tremendously as far as building my business. ⁓ Yeah.

Corrado (06:39)
And can I interrupt quickly?

I, cause that is one thing that I wanted to make sure and highlight from you. Throughout our entire time, the moment from the moment our pastor introduced us, like that I was like, Hey, I'm considering moving. Do you know anyone? He introduced me to you. My wife and I always, always just used to like be in awe of your follow-up game. Like it was incredible. Like

Rebecca (07:03)
⁓ wow.

Corrado (07:06)
My wife has a background, she used to be like a CFO or something like that, at a real estate branch and everything. And so she knows a lot about the inner workings of team leaders and this and all of that stuff. To me, I don't understand half of that stuff. So sometimes when it's real estate stuff, I'm like, hey babe, how does this work? how did it? She's like, oh, this is how the team works and this is, you And we were always in awe about your follow-up game.

Rebecca (07:19)
huh, huh.

Yes.

Corrado (07:34)
because from the moment they could use the pastor connected us, it was every single holiday, every once in a while, we always got something in the mail and it even went as far. this is where I, but much of that you can kind of easily go, well, that's automated. It's kind of like on a timely basis, you know, all of that stuff, but where really took a different meaning of your level of detail and follow-up and care was

We went through a family death and all of that stuff and I think in one of our interactions I kind of like mentioned it and all that stuff and lo and behold that same week There was a handwritten note from Rebecca in our mailbox in Miami like, know Wishing us to all of this stuff and we were like, wow, this girl just doesn't skip a beat like it's amazing So for any realtors out there ⁓ listening, honestly that follow-up is is critical. It's critical. So

Rebecca (08:17)
⁓

⁓ it's okay.

That's amazing.

Thanks for sharing that. You know, it's been like...

I've learned, I got connected to an incredible organization actually through Ramsey's called the ⁓ Brian Bafini organization. But they have a coaching program and so I'm part of that. But yeah, a big part of that is just personal notes. And it's kind of a lost art these days and I absolutely love it. It's something that I actually feel is a strength of mine. I'm a natural encourager and detail oriented. so yeah, it's an honor to let people know how appreciated they are and just to let the little things stand out and just let

them know it's been recognized. feel like too often we focus on the negative and people don't get to hear the positive very much. So yeah, it's one of my favorite parts of my job is just like, just encouraging people and just building a relationship with people and not even, mean, maybe it'll turn in the business, but even if it doesn't, just having the relationship is just huge and it honestly communities everything.

Corrado (09:21)
And that's a principle that I think not only applies to real estate, right? Like any kind of business, like you can take that level of care and you can take that level of, again, like you said, the premium that our handwritten note carries these days is unbelievable, right? Cause in the noise of all the junk mail that we get, all of a sudden there's like a handwritten note, you're like, wait, wait, what? Wait, who took the time to actually write it? So.

Rebecca (09:25)
Mm-hmm.

Yes. Yes.

Yeah.

Yep, that's true.

Corrado (09:49)
Anything

else that you're looking back you go, wow, thank God for this lesson because it has really shaped kind of like my business nowadays.

Rebecca (09:55)
Yeah, gosh, I had

the same boss the entire time I was at Ramsey's and ⁓ he was absolutely instrumental and incredible in helping me become the leader I am today. He's such a good leader and he had a good leader to look up to and so it kind of just trickled down. But ⁓ he taught me a lot just about listening to people, about kind of shaving the raw edges off my personality and how to actually ⁓ handle conflict well, ⁓ ask the right questions. ⁓ So many things I do today.

or because of what he taught me and it wasn't just words but it was also watching him lead and so I would say I'm a better leader and business owner today because of the boss I had for all those years. His name is Heath, so Heath Hartzog, yep, credible guy.

Corrado (10:35)
What was his name? Heath.

Awesome. And so as you're navigating right now, all of this stuff, you know, middle Tennessee, real estate, everything, obviously the area is exploding with, you know, people like me coming from, from out of state. What, what, from your experience, what do you think is, is what makes middle Tennessee so unique and that's attracting so many people?

Rebecca (10:51)
Yeah. yes. Definitely.

Mm-hmm. ⁓

Well, I definitely think one of the things people love is the climate. You get all four seasons here. So I've heard that mentioned quite a bit. Let's be real. No state income tax is a big draw for people. Financially, you can get a lot more for your money here than you can a lot of these other more expensive places, especially like California, New York, Chicago. We've had a lot of people move from those places. And during the huge influx in like 2021, gosh, people were putting down, you 200 grand over asking price. But for them, like it was still

a huge deal because of what they were coming from. So affordability is a big factor. But then also I just think it's the people here. ⁓ People are so friendly, they're so including, they just want to build community. I've just heard people wanting to come here and just plug into something and so many people are finding that. And we're just finding they've found relationships that are...

what they've been looking for their entire lives. And so there's just some beautiful communities here. you know, I'd say there's definitely the financial aspect of it. Definitely some of it's the weather, but then also the community is a big pole.

Corrado (12:12)
And how are you feeling about overall, like the, you know, the growth is it, you know, do you find it exciting? it, you know, overwhelming? Like what are the pros and cons from cause you've been here how long?

Rebecca (12:23)
Oh

yeah, gosh, since 1990. So, yeah, 25 years.

Corrado (12:25)
Yeah,

maybe kind of give me your perspective as a logo of like, what are some of the pros? What are some of the cons beyond what I've heard traffic? ⁓ But obviously coming from Miami to me, that's still not considered traffic, but I can.

Rebecca (12:33)
Yeah.

What? Huh? Huh?

I know I warned you about Main Street and Spring Hill and

you and Nathie were like, really? Is this the traffic you warned us about? So it's all about perspective, I guess.

Corrado (12:48)
Hahaha!

Rebecca (12:51)
Yeah, gosh, for me, I love it. I think the growth is exciting. I love seeing all the new things. It is kind of sentimental to think back to the quote unquote old days and be like, oh, I remember when this mall was first built and this store used to be here and when this area used to be a mall. I mean, those things are fun, but I love change. I love seeing how things have grown over time. I think some of the challenges are the traffic. think some of it is sort of we're losing a lot of just the land. know, everything's becoming a neighbor.

And so it's kind of you having to go further and further out to get more of the the country feel basically you used to have that right here in like Thompson Station Spring Hill not so much anymore, especially Spring Hill It exists again. You just have to go further out. So I think that's a con You're not getting that feel as much. It's not feeling as much like a small town anymore It's feeling like a big town Nashville's definitely on the map tons of people come here for bachelorette parties and you know, it's it's a destination now But that comes with perks,

⁓ I mean, we're getting a whole new airport. Like you're getting brand new hotels that are fantastic. So I guess it's all about your perspective. So prices are definitely increasing. You thinking about what you could buy a home for even like 2018 versus now, it's insane how much the prices have increased. So that would be a con, especially for people that have lived here and have been saving up and it just continues to feel out of reach. ⁓ Yeah.

Corrado (14:13)
or for their kids, that was something that,

an argument that I heard the other day that I was like, actually hadn't thought about that. Like somebody who's been here their entire life and now they're seeing their kids get priced out of somewhere, yeah. And that was one argument that I had never considered. I had always looked at it from like the first point of like, you're local and you wanna move, got it. But ⁓ from the next generation, that definitely.

Rebecca (14:19)
Yeah.

Right. Yeah. Yeah. So.

Yes.

Yeah.

I know that's definitely tough. So, and I'm seeing more and more parents that are kind of in the ability to step in and help their kids a little bit with their first purchase, which I think that's amazing. That's a huge goal. I'd love to be able to do that for our kids. But yeah, it's kind of necessary now, you know? So, so I'd say that's a con too. I mean, overall, I think it's a pro. I think there's a lot of good things about it. ⁓ I love all the people it's bringing here. I mean, I think that's my favorite part. It's sort of this big melting pot. Almost no one is quote unquote from here, you know? ⁓

Corrado (15:08)
Right.

Rebecca (15:10)
Yeah, I think it's great. I think it's a wonderful place to live. I can't imagine living anywhere else. So I don't blame people for wanting to come this way.

Corrado (15:17)
Do you think with all of these people that are coming here, do you think we are handling it fine in terms of keeping what's special about Middle Tennessee true? Or do you think we're running the risk of maybe losing some of that?

Rebecca (15:33)
You know, I've heard a lot of people say that they don't like certain things others are bringing in with them. I mean, there's probably some truth to that, but I haven't felt that as much. know, to me, like for example, the community we're in feels so much like the community I grew up in. And you know, that was back in the 90s. And so like to me, it's all about the people. And I think you're getting all kinds of people here, but I...

I think we're keeping intact what middle Tennessee is for the most part. mean, again, it probably depends on the circles you run in, I feel nothing but positive for the people that are coming and for keeping, even though it's getting to be a bigger town, it can still have that small town feel. And I definitely feel that that's not going away.

Corrado (16:17)
Yeah, I kind of agree with you because, and I think I was mentioning this to somebody else that I was talking with. Obviously I've been meeting a lot of people and a lot of people from like California and other places. ⁓ And one of the things that I've noticed is the common kind of like thread with all of the people, especially from like California, funny enough, it's they've all, it was almost as if they all hit like a breaking point where they said, okay, enough.

Rebecca (16:22)
Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Corrado (16:48)
And they wanted to jump ship not that they're coming here trying to make, you know, Tennessee, California, but they were, they're really legitimately trying to like, okay, there was just a little too much. I wasn't 100 % at home. Maybe there was something specific tying them down there or they love the weather or whatever, but it was just one extra little thing that they were like, okay, that's it. I hate to leave, but I have to. And so they're looking, they were kind of the odd ball.

Rebecca (16:54)
Right.

Yeah.

Right.

Corrado (17:17)
over there and they're coming here and they're finding themselves feeling at home, which is certainly for, for, know, even coming from Florida, which is, you know, in many ways, very similar to Tennessee, you know, I was in Miami and that is it that I don't, I don't even consider Miami United States. That's its own, you know, culture unique, like nothing else. And for us, it feels like, wow, like we're, we feel like I feel like home in a way that

Rebecca (17:27)
It is, yeah.

right.

Right.

More home.

Corrado (17:46)
I probably didn't over there, you know? ⁓ Yeah. Exactly, exactly. ⁓ So we've kind of talked a little bit about your background, your journey into real estate, all that stuff. What's something that you, looking back, ⁓ a decision, a moment or something like that, maybe...

Rebecca (17:49)
You had to find your people. Almost feel like you found your people here.

Yeah.

Corrado (18:14)
I kind of call it as like your favorite failure or something like that or something like that. Something, know, success is never linear, right? An up and down or a moment or something that really shaped who you are today or something that happened that you go, man, in that moment, that was tough. That was a tough lesson to learn or a failure, a business failure or something like that. But that looking back, you go, thank God that happened because if not, I wouldn't have X, Y or Z.

Rebecca (18:18)
Hmm. Right,

Yeah.

If not...

Yeah, gosh for me it was actually a principal thing and talking about kind of sawing off the rough edges of my personality. So I'm a very detailed person. I love to do things right. And so one of the things I struggled with is definitely as a young person was being technically right but relationally wrong.

So caring about the little details that didn't matter and kind of pushing forward on something that honestly had nothing to do with the situation. And really as kind of a young sort of immature business person, ⁓ I would do that with my fellow salespeople. I would constantly like correct them and little things again like that didn't matter like, hey, it was ⁓ they're from this city, not this city, which had nothing to do with the point of the story ⁓ or just really pushing my opinion forward even if it wasn't asked for.

And so I, you know, it's funny because my dad would work with me on that growing up, never quite stuck, but it was my boss, Heath, my leader, he actually took me aside one time and he's the one that gave me that phrase. Like Rebecca, he's like, you can be technically right but relationally wrong. And that stuck with me. And I have...

constantly remembered that moving forward and that's helped me not only relationally and my family but also in my business. Really remembering, hey, what's the right thing to do in this situation? Are we off by a little bit?

for the relationship's sake, it's not worth bringing up these little details. ⁓ And it sounds funny to say something little like that, but it really was something that could turn people off to my personality, ⁓ was just being a know-it-all and always trying to share my opinion on everything and just having to mature and recognize there's a time for that, there's a time to let those things go and to just build the relationship. ⁓ I use that with, have a son that struggles with the same thing. And so I help him with that. ⁓

Corrado (20:29)
And now you're seeing yourself

in the mirror, right?

Rebecca (20:34)
Exactly. So, but it's great because I'm like, I understand why this feels important to you, why you feel you have to share this, but let me tell you, that is not going to serve you well in the real world. And so that is a principle that I've carried with me that definitely shaped who I am in business and personal.

Corrado (20:50)
You mentioned that your dad used to deal with it with you, but it wasn't until Heath came around that it finally kind of clicked. Why, why do you think that's, that was the case? Cause this is, and you know, you just mentioned, right? Like you're, dealing that with your son. And so you're telling him maybe, maybe he needs to have his own version of Mr. Heath to show up at some point in his life. It's going to be like, man, my mom used to tell me this, but it wasn't. What, why do you think that happens? The, the idea that you're

Rebecca (20:53)
Yep.

Yeah.

Yep, totally.

Yep, he does. I think so.

Corrado (21:17)
people you know your parents are telling you the same thing but a stranger says and you're like yeah that makes sense you know

Rebecca (21:20)
Yep. Yes,

yeah, I think so. You know, I think there's a level of comfortability with your family. ⁓

And you know, yes, I've always respected my parents, but I think there's just a different level of respect with, for example, like a leader at work. Like I would hear my dad, but I don't think I really heard how big of a deal it was. And it's like, it's just my family. It's okay. It's not that big of a deal. ⁓ This isn't going to affect me that badly. But then I think when the same issue gets brought up in the workplace or wherever it does for somebody, you're like, my gosh, like I was warned about this. Like this is actually affecting my performance. This is affecting

my ⁓ relationship with these people here, okay, this is serious. So it just almost takes that second opinion from an outside person, I think, to bring the seriousness to the situation and be like, no, this isn't just a quirk that my family doesn't like. No, this is like a real thing I need to work on if I want to become the best version of myself.

Corrado (22:19)
Anything else that Heath ⁓ or any other principles, any other lessons that you can look back and remember Heath teaching you.

Rebecca (22:28)
Yeah, I think one of the things like with sales I learned, ⁓ silence gets you a lot. don't always have to fill the space. And I remember having a conversation with one of my agents I worked with at the time and there was something we were disagreeing on as far as something that needed to be paid on. And I just remember having the conversation and then.

just sitting there in silence. I think it was like 30 seconds and it was so uncomfortable. But he came, you know, he came through, he's like, he's like, if you ever need a job and you need to become a realtor, I will hire you in two seconds. All right, I'm sending the check. And I was like, okay, the silence paid off. So I think in sales, you know, that's one thing we've all had to learn is it's like, you don't have to fill the space. Sometimes you just need to be silent, let the other person process and that will get you to where you need to be.

Corrado (23:19)
100 % yes, silence in sales negotiations of any type, you know, because I feel like there's always, there's that one layer of extra information that sometimes you get just by just sitting in silence. And it is awkward, right? It is very awkward. And so people naturally want to fill that with additional information.

Rebecca (23:23)
Yep. Yep.

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Definitely.

Yeah, and a huge part of my job is negotiating.

And so I use those principles every day, negotiating with other agents, pushing for what my clients want, doing it in a way that helps me get them the best deals.

Corrado (23:52)
Yeah. If you could go back right now, 10 years and give yourself a piece of advice, right? Like Rebecca has learned a lot of things in the past 10 years. ⁓ what do you think you're telling yourself 10 years ago?

Rebecca (24:00)
Yeah.

Yeah, 10 years ago, I would tell myself to listen to my gut. So I went through, gosh, a lot of hard stuff in my first marriage, and a lot of that was not listening to my gut, not trusting what my body was telling me. ⁓

And if I could go back, I would definitely teach myself that. And I would just say, no, listen, your body keeps the score. You know the right next move. You can trust yourself. And I think when you doubt yourself, it can create a whole world of trouble. And I teach that to my kids now. We have different situations that come up. I'll be like, hey, what does your body tell you about that situation? Even if they have someone tell me, I think this person is not telling me the truth. OK, well, tell me why you feel that way.

in

your body somewhere, so much I've learned through lots of counseling and lots of book reading, all those kind of things. But gosh, I'm like, okay, it's not for naught if I can use these principles and share these with my kids or I've met with other women who going through similar situations. And ⁓ gosh, that would definitely be something I would love to tell myself 10 years ago.

Corrado (25:17)
Have you seen those things that happened in the past be used for edifying or helping other people currently?

Rebecca (25:26)
Yeah, absolutely. One of my passions is kind of walking with families ⁓ who are struggling with someone that has addictions because that's a whole family disease. And I've learned so much about that. And it's definitely a passion of mine. I've had a couple women reach out who know a little bit of my story and are just like, hey, I kind of know what you went through. I'm going through something similar. Can I talk with you? Can I meet with you? And to me, that's a huge benefit where Satan meant something for evil.

God can turn it for good. And I had a few people who were there for me in a time like that. And so if I can just turn that around, be there for those people, that is my goal and my kind of a joy, I guess, to be able to walk with people who are going through tough times and share what I've learned and just be a voice of encouragement for them. For families that kind of have someone there, there's a lot of shame and it's hard to even be honest about that. I think just kind of getting that out in the story, be like, hey, you don't need to have any shame. It's okay.

you for you to talk to somebody about this and ⁓ to get the help that you need to grow as a person. And yeah, it changed my life having a few people that walked me through with that. And so yeah, doing the same for others is definitely something that I've seen the Lord do with that.

Corrado (26:43)
Do you mind if you don't mind, can I ask a little bit of like, maybe give a little bit more insight of what is it that you went through and all of it? Because I don't think you've ever shared that with me or.

Rebecca (26:46)
Yes. Yeah, yeah, absolutely.

Yeah, probably not. And I share, I think just because if my story can help anybody, I think that's the reason that I feel like sharing it is a positive thing. ⁓

In my first marriage, very early on, my first husband struggled with alcohol addiction. And I'd never really been exposed to that. And so honestly for me, it even took a while for me to figure out that it was an alcohol addiction. ⁓ I just thought, okay, he likes to drink a little too much. And I didn't know what the signs were for that. And so there were a lot of years of going through.

episodes of him drinking too much and me dealing with that and trying to figure out how to handle it. And honestly, for me, the first thing that I did was fall very much into the codependent role ⁓ and became very controlling. And, you know, I've since learned you don't become controlling because you want to control. It's because you want to feel safe. And if you can't feel emotionally safe or know that what your environment is going to look like, it does turn into control. Like, hey, you can only drink this much. know, you, you know, where are you going to be at?

All these things, there's just no trust there. You know, when you've had someone violate that so many times. ⁓

You know, and I've heard, I've listened to another podcast a lot and he talks, he has a very broad view of fidelity and marriage and he's like, hey, it's not just necessarily sleeping with somebody else. You can cheat on your spouse, you know, with alcohol or, you know, with other kinds of addictions or with, ⁓ always being on the golf course or, you know, all of these things, you know? And so I think for me, it took a lot to understand. I thought like, I need to stay in this marriage no matter what, you know, I promise I'm to do this no matter what kind of harm it brings to me. I've got to stay in this marriage.

And

that was just a false narrative that I had created based on maybe books I read or things like that. And it takes, I guess it takes two to want a healthy marriage. And for me, I knew I had to do everything I could. Because I had to be able to look my kids in the eyes one day and be like, hey, I did everything I could to stay in this marriage and make this work. And at the end of the day, he didn't choose us. He chose alcohol. I think since then, maybe he's

working on that and sober in those ways. But it was one of those things where honestly this community that we're in now helped me tremendously to walk through that. And what I had to learn too was working on my own health. And once I learned, ⁓ I'm contributing to the problem because I have these codependent habits and I have all of these things that are making me worry and make these decisions that I wouldn't normally make as far as ⁓ staying up all night because I was so worried about what was going

happen and it was just affecting my health and affecting my kids because then I couldn't be the best mom. So you know I think once I saw things affecting my kids more and I realized how I could help myself and walk in my health and then also letting people into our quote-unquote secret you know it's like I didn't tell anybody for years probably gosh probably 11 years really that this was anything on so letting people into that and then being able to kind of

Corrado (29:56)
Wow.

Rebecca (30:02)
recognized like, yeah, no, this isn't okay. You know, like what my gut is telling me, what my body is telling me is right. You know, this is not okay. It's not okay to live this way. You know, it's not okay to have a house like this. I don't want to raise my children in this and that's okay. All of those things were something that I had to learn. ⁓ And it wouldn't have happened without a good community walking around me and then without me pursuing health in my own areas.

Corrado (30:26)
Yeah, and it's crazy. ⁓ This kind of struck me was what you mentioned about how

These feelings of like insecurity or something like that kind of like how they showed up right like how you felt the need to be then extra controlling in this area or that or something and it reminded me of Many many years back. I don't know if it was a book or or or something that I heard I really stuck with me which was that in in a marriage ⁓ women tend to I Think the word that they use was ⁓ gap fillers ⁓ that women

Rebecca (30:40)
Yeah.

Yes.

Mm-hmm.

Corrado (31:04)
are incredibly by nature adept at filling gaps that are within the household, right? you know, so if let's say the husband is just like very bad at, you know, keeping track of the calendar or something, whatever, then the mom, the woman just naturally just morphs into that. And that you guys have this like incredible ability to just kind of develop a whole new set of skills based on whatever is missing in the house, either naturally.

Rebecca (31:11)
Right, that's good.

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Right.

Corrado (31:34)
or just by sheer laziness on the guys part, right? So as a husband, I can take a very laid back approach and be like, well, the wife will figure it out or this or that. And most of the time the woman will be like, yes, fine. And then guys wake up one day and they go like, but my wife is doing all these things that I don't like. It's like, well, you kind of opened up the spot, you left it. It's a vacuum.

Rebecca (31:38)
You ⁓

Corrado (31:59)
the, the, it's going to get filled in somehow. And

Rebecca (31:59)
So good, yeah. That's true. Right.

Corrado (32:02)
it's nine times out of 10 going to be by her. So if you don't like those places, then maybe you need to step in and you need to take exactly. so that's incredible. The fact that you, you recognize that those feelings of insecurity and everything was, what was leading you to, do that. That's incredible. Um, if you, if we go back forward,

Rebecca (32:05)
Right. Makes sense.

Yeah. Look in the mirror.

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Corrado (32:28)
10 years, right? Rebecca 10 years is coming back to today and giving you a piece of advice. What do you think Rebecca from 10 years is telling you today?

Rebecca (32:42)
I would probably say give myself grace. You know, figuring out ⁓ this blended family thing is so new and a large family and all of this. And I know we're gonna figure it out and I know our kids are.

are gonna thrive, we're gonna get this together, but I think give myself grace, know, because it's like I struggle with, I want everything to be right and to be perfect all the time and to create the best environment. It's like I want the best of everything. And just realizing grace, you know, let's give ourselves time, you know, don't rush it, we're gonna get there. It's just one step at a time, the next right thing. And you know, we're gonna create a beautiful blended family and we hope to create something that down the road we can help other families with, you know, so yeah, I think give myself grace.

in all these areas and not push myself too far too fast.

Corrado (33:32)
Yeah. And I think kind of how you were mentioning earlier that even it's okay, even if you're not technically correct, right? And some things, as long as you're relationally correct, that's going to stick with me for a while now. Not technically correct is I feel like I'm probably very guilty of that. I feel like if I asked my wife that she'll probably be like, ⁓ yeah, you like to be technically correct a lot. That's awesome. Any, any

Rebecca (33:40)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Right. Yes. Good. Yep.

Yeah.

huh. Yep, that phrase sticks with me for sure.

Corrado (34:02)
Quotes versus anything that you think of often as you are going throughout your day. That kind of keep your compass heading north.

Rebecca (34:14)
Yeah, you know, honestly, for me, I don't know if it's a quote or anything, but really just wanting to be the best version of myself and not being something or someone I'm not, but the best version of me and just continuing to refine that and figure out, okay, like who is in there and what kind of steps do I need to take today to bring that woman out? And, you know, how can I be, you know, the...

the best realtor, the best wife, the best mom, like all these things. you know, always just trying to figure out, think.

You know, what is that next right step for me? And how can I love on people today? That's a big thing that stays forefront on my mind is how can I make that person feel special feel loved on feel seen and Just really I've kind of come to a point where I realize a lot of times we think good things about people We don't share it. So I've kind of wanted to be like, okay If I if I see somebody and I love that woman's sweater, I want to tell her be like, your sweater is wonderful I love it, you know rather than just keeping that compliment in my head and the same thing like hey

when you spoke the other day, you did fantastic, great job. ⁓ Again, rather than just keeping those things in my head. So, being proactive, looking for ways to appreciate people, looking for ways to encourage people, looking for ways to love people, and then just using that to help me become the best version of myself.

Corrado (35:33)
I it. know, there's a, there's a, in a similar fashion. ⁓ I heard in this podcast the other day, something that I've been trying that has been, I've been getting a lot of satisfaction from it. It's been great. ⁓ was applying the same thing, but with people that you maybe haven't been in touch with in a while, that the moment that something happens, right? You see something that it reminds you of that person. And this happens to all of us, right? Like you go through life and every day, a ton of different things remind you of a ton of different people. Right. ⁓

Rebecca (35:49)
Yeah.

Yes. ⁓

You do.

Corrado (36:03)
Taking the time to just randomly out of the blue, if I see a book that reminded me of someone, just like text, literally just out of the blue, text that person like, hey, I saw this book today and it reminded me of you, hope all is well. Just those random little things and I've been trying it for the past few months, amazing. I've gotten to reconnect with a bunch of people that I...

Rebecca (36:10)
Yes.

Yes.

Yes, exactly that.

Yes.

Corrado (36:26)
had lots to touch with for years, you know, but for some reason they just naturally, and the key is that, right? Like doing genuinely, like they genuinely popped into my head and instead of letting that thought pass and go, actually taking action and like sending them a quick text or picking up the phone and calling them, awesome. So.

Rebecca (36:28)
Yeah, yeah.

Right.

Yeah.

Yes.

Yeah, taking

action at that five second rule by Mel Robbins. I don't know if you've ever read that book, but she talks about when you have the nudge to do something, just do it. Count down five, four, three, two, one, do it. And so it's the same thing like with that, going up and meeting somebody or sending that text or whatever the case is. If you're like, oh, should I, should I not count down from five and make yourself just do it?

Corrado (36:51)
No.

Okay?

And the craziest thing, I mean, literally this past week, it happened to me. This couple that I photographed their wedding, gosh, I want to say it was maybe like 16 years ago, for some odd reason, the guy just kind of popped into my head, ⁓ sent him a text, hey, all is well, saw this thing, reminded me of you. And he was like, my God, you're not going to believe it. Just this past week, we were talking about you. And I was like, wow. So we kind of like reconnected that way and everything.

Rebecca (37:28)
wow.

my gosh! That's

amazing!

Corrado (37:38)
Yeah.

Okay, so now I'm going to get to a special section of the show called the 615 Rapid Fire. Okay, so I'm going to throw out some random questions at you. The first thing that comes to mind, anything, let me know. So you get a billboard on I-65 for one full year and it says anything you want, anything you want on that billboard. What is the billboard? What does it say?

Rebecca (37:46)
Alright, got it.

Okay.

offering ridiculous customer service.

Corrado (38:07)
OK, cool. Describe your idea of the perfect day in Middle Tennessee.

Rebecca (38:15)
Fall, absolutely, probably 68 degrees, gorgeous leaves on the trees, getting a pumpkin spice latte, walking around downtown Franklin, doing some shopping, doing some lunch, ⁓ maybe heading to a park, ⁓ reading a book out on a blanket in a park, and then probably maybe some chili that night and then maybe watching an NFL football game. Sounds perfect to me.

Corrado (38:42)
Love it. What

team are you rooting for?

Rebecca (38:44)
⁓ definitely Green Bay Packers.

Corrado (38:50)
⁓

Favorite middle Tennessee food spot and dish?

Rebecca (38:56)
my goodness, there's so many to choose from. ⁓ Probably, probably Brunch Collective, which is in Spring Hill. my gosh, their food is fantastic. And then,

Corrado (39:05)
Okay.

Grunge Collective, okay? I haven't, I have not been there. I need to...

Rebecca (39:12)
Brunch Collective, yeah, it's amazing. they,

everything is homemade, organic, no seed oils, fresh, everything is fantastic. They don't even own a microwave. Brunch Collective is great. And then they have, I think it's called Christie's Bowl. And so it's got, ⁓ it's like, it's eggs and spicy sausage and avocado and ⁓ they're bacon dipped in like maple syrup and my gosh, it's incredible. Hash browns, the whole thing. So it's a favorite for sure.

Corrado (39:36)
woof, love it.

Love it. Other middle Tennessee people, businesses or stories that you want to show a little bit of love to that you think I should have on the show.

Rebecca (39:50)
Yeah, oh man,

that's great. You know, it'd be fun. You definitely have Dustin Smith on the show if he'll come. So yeah, talking about the songwriting and he has so many great stories, honestly. Let's see here. Who else? There's so many great businesses. Jody Hill is doing a new parenting.

Corrado (40:00)
Working on it, working on it.

OK.

Rebecca (40:17)
business and has wonderful parenting advice. She's fabulous. I love everything that she shares. So definitely love her and love what she's doing. And let's see here. Gosh, I feel like there's so many people have small businesses here. This is such an entrepreneurial town, which I absolutely love. So there's probably more people I could think of. Those people are top of mind though.

Corrado (40:40)
Very

good, very good. So before we sign off and you tell people how to connect with you, how to find anything more about you, ⁓ what's next for Rebecca? What are you working on? Anything exciting?

Rebecca (40:52)
Yeah.

Okay. So a great project is Mariani Home. So my husband actually got his real estate license and he's been doing real estate for a little while too. So we're joining a team together. So that's a new project is getting that off the ground. Kind of having our own family business. So we're kind of just combining businesses and putting that together. So we're working on our branding and all of that. So we're super excited to do business together. So that's probably our, yeah, that's our newest project. So ⁓

Corrado (41:05)
Nice.

Very cool.

Rebecca (41:24)
Yeah, working on what that looks like, learning each other's strengths in business and where we can, know, where he's weak, I'm strong and vice versa and how we can best compliment each other. So we're really excited about this.

Corrado (41:35)
If there's anything to know is that Mariani Holmes is gonna have an incredible follow-up game. That I know for sure.

Rebecca (41:40)
That's true, yes, 100%.

You know that.

Corrado (41:46)
⁓ any parting thoughts, anything that we didn't talk about, anything that we didn't cover that you want to leave, ⁓ the listeners with anything.

Rebecca (41:55)
Yeah, I think for me the biggest thing that's come up lately is how important community is. And it's like you were not meant to do life alone. And you were meant to do life with people and with good people. And so, you know, I think if you don't have a community yet, don't give up, keep looking. If you have it, press in, don't take those relationships, you know, for... ⁓

Corrado (42:18)
granite.

Rebecca (42:18)
You might

have to edit this part out. just totally lost my train of thought. For granted, that's what I was looking for. Okay. Don't take those relationships for granted, you know, if you have them because they're so important. So, you know, in your personal life, in your work, in all the things, you know, have community, press into it, and just remember you weren't meant to do life alone.

Corrado (42:22)
Yeah.

love it. And last but not least, what is the best way for people to connect with you, find out more about Mariani Homes, all of that stuff.

Rebecca (42:46)
Yeah,

yep, so ⁓ Instagram is Rebecca, R-E-B-E-C-C-A-R-C-Mariani, ⁓ and same on Facebook. And then yeah, our website will be Mariani Homes. So, yep, would love to connect at any of those places.

Corrado (43:04)
awesome love it Rebecca thank you so much for this for sharing part of your story and as I said in the beginning thank you for making personally selfishly my move to Middle Tennessee such an enjoyable experience

Rebecca (43:19)
⁓

gosh, seriously my pleasure both to be on the podcast and to help get you guys here. I just, love having your family here. So thanks for having me today. Thanks.

Corrado (43:28)
Thank you.

Corrado (43:32)
Hey there, if you enjoyed this episode don't forget to like, subscribe and share with someone you think would find it interesting. Until next time, thank you for tuning in.